And what do we get for all of those dollars spent? In addition to that shitty-looking CGI deer and its gallons of piss, there's a non-sensical sequence where David Spade's character rapidly rolls all over town while stuck inside a massive tire, a stupid, time-wasting bit that ends with Spade projectile vomiting out of said tire. Grown Ups 2 also cost around $80 million. None of that money is on the screen-Sandler and company might as well have wiped their asses with it for 90 minutes. And since the cinema gods hate us all, Grown Ups grossed a whopping $271 million, a disheartening number that makes it easy to overlook the fact that the film cost somewhere between $70-$80 million to produce. Sandler knew that his fans would migrate to multiplexes in droves to see him riff with James, Spade, and Rock (forget Schneider, because, come on, no one on Earth loves that guy) thus, he and co-screenwriter Fred Wolf exerted zero mental power while penning the script, nor did he or his co-stars try to push themselves comedically. In his movies, the first sign of Sandler's lack of fucks given towards his raunch-loving minions came with Grown Ups in 2010-plotless and devoid of any creativity or gumption, Sandler's 'dream team' collaboration with old pals Kevin James, David Spade, Rob Schneider, and Chris Rock is little more than an excuse for overpaid friends to spend time together, call upon Sandler's go-to director for all things lackadaisical, Dennis Dugan, to shoot their antics, and somehow convince a major studio to release it theatrically. And don't forget the equally rotten films he's produced over the four years: Zookeeper (2011), the one where buddy Kevin James gets hit in the crotch whenever he's not talking to animals, and Bucky Larson: Born to be a Star, the singularly disgraceful train wreck starring Sandler's modern-day Memphis Bleek, the screen-tainter Nick Swardson. Since the disappointing box office returns of the mostly impressive 2009 dramedy Funny People, a rare example of Sandler challenging himself as an actor, he's been on a downward roll, crapping out one underwhelming comedy after another: Grown Ups, Just Go With It (2011), Jack and Jill, That's My Boy (2012), and now Grown Ups 2. Yes, it's much worse than Jack and Jill (2012), in which Sandler played man/woman twin siblings and, as a hideous female, flirted with a shameful, paycheck-chasing Al Pacino.

That's all, folks.īefore any critics were abused by Grown Ups 2 this week, Sandler's worst film to date was, indeed, the first Grown Ups-compared to its rancid, exceptionally bad sequel, Grown Ups is Airplane!. James gets off three solid burpsnarts in the film, but the last one's saved for Grown Ups 2's head honcho, the Sandman, who finally achieves his dream of burpsnarting right before he's about to pork his pregnant wife. Just as there will be jokes about farting, or, to be more specific, something called a 'Burpsnart,' explained by Kevin James' character as the trifecta of burping, sneezing, and farting, all in succession, basically one motion. The scene serves no purpose, of course, other than to remind viewers that they're watching a Happy Madison Productions release, and, oh yes, there will be gags about bodily emissions. And then it runs around their house, finds Sandler's oldest son in the shower, and pisses all over him. Once Hayek's character wakes up and screams in frightened surprise, the deer emits a geyser of piss all over Sandler's face.

The opening scene of this abhorrent sequel to the lazily written and lazily performed 2010 blockbuster comedy Grown Ups finds star/producer/primary culprit Adam Sandler waking up in bed, alongside his gorgeous, way-out-of-his-league wife (played by Salma Hayek), to the sight of a deer casually hanging out in his room. For a film that spends 100 minutes pissing and shitting all over its (sucker) audience's hard-earned money, it doesn't get more perfect than that.

Grown Ups 2 begins with urine and ends with flatulence. To the film's credit, it does have one thing going for it: There have never been more appropriate bookending moments in a movie. In Grown Ups 2, there are no legitimate jokes-as in, you know, anything that will make you laugh.

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